Readjustment: Putting the pieces back together after reverse culture shock

   

  This is a continuation of a post I wrote back in 2019, having just returned from doing ministry in Ireland and charity work in an island of Spain called Ibiza from Spring of 2017-October 2019, you can read that post here if you would like. 

    The third stage of reverse culture shock is "readjustment".  "Readjustment" is defined as when-

"Things are no longer so shocking and you are less critical about aspects of your culture that bothered you during the dampened euphoria stage. You begin to analyze what you learned abroad and decide how you will apply it to your life in your home country. You may decide to adopt certain host culture characteristics or habits into your daily life. You may begin to think about how to apply what you’ve learned both academically and professionally"

   I haven't had the thoughts up until the past week as to fully process what that looks like but as I spend time letting my brain slow down and reflecting on the past year (as all good writers do (: ), I find myself mainly focusing not only on what God has done and how He worked through the bad stuff of 2020 but also what God had done in me, in helping me put back the pieces together of a puzzle that I thought were lost. Though I've been back for a couple of years, some pieces are not the same and I will accept that. I still throw Irish slang around without thinking twice. I laugh at memes and videos from Irish Instagram accounts, reels and TikTok's.  If you invite me over for dinner or a dinner party, I'll likely bring something with me to thank you for hosting as it's a cultural habit I've picked up. I still struggle sometimes in church to connect with God the way I used to because of how I connected with God in Ireland was through prayer, images and words. Prayer ministry was a big thing for me in Ireland and Ibiza and hearing from God through words and pictures. I experience it some in the States but not as much as I used to nor do I know where I can fully embrace that within the American churches I've been a part of this year.  I'm still sorting it out. I still miss being so close to both the mountains and the sea. I crave chips from the chipper and a proper gin and tonic. I could go on about how it was hard to readjust when so many things in my life changed while I was gone. Friends uprooted their lives, there were changes in my church community and even just silly changes at my favorite places. I could go on about how trying to readjust in the midst of a worldwide pandemic made things a heck of a lot even harder, but I would just talk in circles so I'll just say, it was very difficult, discouraging and I really had to take things one day at a time but then things got better and I felt more hopeful and willing to accept what God wanted to show me in my hometown. 

   He showed me to  accept who I am. An American with a past of being a missionary and to accept that with that comes growing pains that will also be a part of me. I will always see the world, life and ministry differently than I used to. Jesus will always be my home more than anywhere ever in the world ever could especially as still, a few years later-"home" is 2 places to me. I am learning to accept that. I am happy to be in America and it has been truly a blessing (and I mean it) these past couple of years to learn how to do every day mission in life instead of feeling like I need the title "missionary."  I never wanted to learn that lesson but God has decided that that's what He has wanted to teach me and what He wants to continue to show me. How to see my workplace, my community, even my own friends, family and own heart as a space to share Jesus’ love. I need to remind myself of the Gospel every dang day. 

   And with readjustment, it all became familiar to me again. Remembering to tip, remembering that stores add tax, remembering that I will likely get kicked out of restaurant if I'm there for more than 3 hours haha. Remembering the things about America that made me who I am and have impacted my worldview on things. I have traded in my shame for being an American for acceptance that, that is who I am. An American. I hope that I can take all that I have learned from my 2nd home, Ireland and put it to good, here in America. 

If you are currently going through reverse culture shock and feeling discouraged, I promise you it gets better. It will be difficult but keep your friends close, don't shut them out even if you feel misunderstood. They do care and are trying to understand. Stay in touch with those that share your experiences and celebrate those around you. It was helpful for me to remember that other friends in my life had their own big life changes that they were processing and facing. It helped me not get so in my head so much. So hold on, it gets better. It just may take some time. 

Until next time,

Amy