What The Heck, Do I Even Know of Holy?

    

    Sometimes I worry when my pursuit of holiness feels like such a roller coaster that I’m not good enough to be a “real” Christian but that’s not how grace works. The Christian life is not perfect, it is meant to be filled with ups and downs, because well, just because you’re a Christian it does not mean that you are perfect. Nor does it mean that you have it altogether. The difference is that you have hope and you have a strength that is not of your own that can help you through the ups and downs. The truth is you are going to make choices that you know are unwise because you are human and you are going to have moments were you don’t want to do the “right” thing but you choose to do the “right” thing anyways. Paul explains this ongoing battle perfectly in Romans 7:15-25:

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. ¹⁶ And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. ¹⁷ As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. ¹⁸ For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.^[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. ¹⁹ For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. ²⁰ Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

²¹ So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. ²² For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; ²³ but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. ²⁴ What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? ²⁵ Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!”

I think that when you are a Christian, it takes you your entire life to grow. It is as the Holy Spirit works in your heart, that you can begin to actually want to do the “right” thing. It is Christ who makes a Christian “holier”, it is him alone that makes a person pure. There is nothing in a single Christian in this entire planet that has anything in them without Christ to make them pure or holy. It is grace alone that saves and grace alone that sustains. I think that while grace can lead believers (myself included) to feel like they can do whatever they want because they are covered by grace, it can be easy for some people to diminish grace and not want to talk about it, in fears that the message will get lost and people will go jumping off the deep end left and right because grace has them covered. That’s not the right mindset either though. Grace is why Jesus came to save people. Grace is how people are saved and grace is what God offers us every single day.

So if you've ever felt in the same boat as me, give yourself grace and remind yourself where your strength comes from and where your hope is found.