10 Things I Wish I knew 4 years Ago As a Freshman

This time next Saturday, I will walk across the stage and be handed a piece of paper that gives proof that I have completed all 4 years of college. It's both exciting and terrifying all at once. Sometimes my first year here feels so long ago. Other days I can remember it all so clearly. I remember that nervous feeling in your stomach as you head to bed the night before your first day of college courses. I remember all the expectations that flooded my head the second I set foot on campus. I remember feeling like school was Harvey Cedars ( a Christian summer camp my youth group would attend) + school work since I had gone to public school growing up. And I'll never forget how touched I was by the fact that professors genuinely cared and even took prayer requests. I am beyond grateful for my time at LBC and know that I would not have grown had God not brought me here. I think about the things I've learned, things I've regretted, things that stretched me and things that changed. It can be kind of overwhelming when you sit down and really think about it. Though I can look back and wish that I knew exactly what I wanted to do when I first got here, wish that I would have done some things differently or wished that I was more outgoing than I was. I learned that you can only learn from the "should've's" then move forward. It's not worth it spending time racking your brain wondering what you could've done differently. You'll only drive yourself crazy.

Still, I came up with a little list of things I wish I had known 4 years ago based off of the things I've learned. There's so much more I could probably say but if I did, this post would probably end up being 5 pages long. I hope that if you are still in college or about to go to college that you can learn from this list.

1.) I wish that I knew what I wanted to do in life. Though these past 3 years things have changed and that has become more clear, the thing I learned the most is that what matters is not what I am doing but who I am doing it for. Wherever I end up whether that be a dream job or a job that I just take to be able to pay off debt and provide for myself and family someday if I am not seeking to glorfiy God in it, it does not matter.

2.) I wish that I knew it is okay to let down the walls. This one seemed to be an ongoing one. There seemed to be times where I was too scared to get close to certain people or let my guard down a little but through the years I learned that it is better to love others and risk something rather than play it safe and never love at all. You can't protect yourself from getting hurt by boxing yourself in, you have to love and let down the walls. Because the pain that comes from losing people isn't as deep as the regret you will feel for not letting them in.

3.)I wish I knew that it was okay to date without putting too many expectations on the relationship. I think that when I came in as a freshman at Bible College for the first time, having read too many Christian chick flick like literature, it was easy to put so many expectations on this one. Now, I wouldn't say that you should mindlessly get into any relationships if you don't even like the guy/girl. But be open to the possiblity that sometimes you date in college and you don't find "the one". And you know what that's okay because even if you don't end up with somebody you dated while in college or you may make some mistakes in the relationship, you can learn from it. I promise you that you will not be who you become or will grow without that experience.

4.) I wish I knew the amount of effort all relationships take. Relationships(friendships & dating) are give and take. They are not all give and they are not all take. It goes both ways. I think that this is an ongoing one that we can all learn as life goes on. So be sure in your friendships, that you are willing to give others your time and advice and allow others to give you their time and advice.

5.)I wish I knew how much I needed Jesus. Never forget what Jesus did for you. Don't celebrate just once on a Sunday in the spring, remind yourself daily of who you once were, the bondage you were in and what he did for you. Remind yourself of the freedom that you can have only because of him and him alone. Thank him every morning for it. Write it on a card, keep it by your bed. Whatever it takes to remind you that you need Jesus and because of him, you are free.

6.)I wish I knew the value of scripture. God has given us His Word for a reason. It is there to guide us and give us discernment. It is there to advise us and encourage us. Challenge yourself to memorize verses and passages. Our mind is battlefield and the best way to fight impure thoughts or negative thoughts is with His truths. Be sure to spend time each day reading from His Word, soak in the words and allow them to be engraved in your mind.

7.) I wish I knew that it was okay that I didn't have all the answers. It can be easy to put pressure on yourself (especially if you're in Bible College)to feel like you have to fix everything, know everything and always have the right words to say. The truth is though you're only a young adult with so many years of life ahead of you. You are still learning and growing and it's okay to admit if you don't know something. Take time to learn and allow yourself to learn from others.

8.)I wish I knew that it really doesn't matter what people think. This one took me 3 years. Yup, 3 years and I think it's actually an ongoing thing. It took me 3 years to stop worrying what I looked like in public all the time. Worrying if I would be accepted by people. The thing is nobody really is better than anybody else since we're all equally sinners and it's simply not worth it to try to gain approval from others. It's just not. Be yourself, lean on God and be friendly, but don't break your back trying to get everybody to like you because not everybody will but that's okay.

9.) I wish I knew that it's okay to try new things. Don't be afraid to be out of your comfort zone. It may be scary at first when you show up at that new ministry and don't know a soul or maybe you're scared to go sing on stage even though you've led worship at your church for years but the way that you'll be challenged through it will be worth it in the end.

10.) I wish I knew how to be present. This one takes time and is ongoing. It's best to stay in every minute rather than spending so much time worrying about the next because time really does go by pretty fast. So live in the seconds, not the days.

That's just some of what I learned, like I said I could write over 5 pages of this stuff. I guess to close I'd leave you with these things. These really are the most life-shaping 4 years of your life. You're going to go through so many things and you're going to learn a lot. Don't take anything for granted. Don't regret anything, just learn from it. Dance around campus at midnight with your friends when you're stressed about finals, smile at people you don't even know on campus when you walk by, write notes to the people you love every other week, find a place of quiet and visit it by yourself once a week, buy a notebook and write down everything you learn. Make prayer a priority in your life. Spend a maximum of an hour on facebook. Make goofy music videos with your roomates. It's okay to cry in front of your friends. Find someone older you look up to and ask them to invest in your life.The best conversations with friends happen after midnight. Go out with your friends on Friday night even when you're sick. Stay plugged into the news.Meet people you wouldn't normally take the time to meet. Coffee actually tastes pretty good black. Sunshine is a great cure for anything.Allow others who are younger than you to teach you something. Taco Bell tastes best after 10 pm. Create something, whether that be paintings, poems, stories, crafts or baking. Take roadtrips.Go to bonfires. Learn an instrument. Seek God every single day and thank Him for what He's done each and every day.